Time to Make Use of My Dental Plan

Working Author - I want to work at this dental clinic.Typically, I’m a curmudgeon on Halloween and don’t give out candy. I’m that guy, lurking in the darkness to dissuade the kiddies from knocking on my door. This year, since I live in a nice area now, I’ve shed my loner ways and am actually quite neighborly. So, to stay in the spirit of things and as a great way to get to know the people in my apartment complex, I splurged on candy for when they come a-knockin’. Not only did I buy candy, but I bought “name” candy. You know, the working class candy: Snickers, Baby Ruth, Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. That’s the kind of candy I sought after when I was a child, so why not give it out as an adult? None of that candy fit for the ghetto in the clear plastic wrapping. Brach’s = no good.

Anyway, since this is my first Halloween at this complex, I’ve yet to find out what kind of foot traffic to expect. It’s 7 p.m. at this moment and not one knock. I’m starting to think that no one trick-or-treats around here. Come to think of it, it’s a lot of work for too little gain since I live in a three story complex with no elevators. Furthermore, the apartments on a given floor aren’t necessarily “connected.” Meaning, going up one flight of stairs only gets you access to four apartments before you have to go back down and then up the next flight for the next four apartments. That’s a decent workout for in-shape adults. Imagine what that’ll do for tiny legs.

So, I’m going to start making my dinner and we’ll see if anyone comes. I won’t expect them, though, leaving $30 worth of candy all for me!

My dentist is going to have his work cut out for himself.

Editor-in-Chief/Publisher
  1. We don’t get any trick or treaters here. It’s a fairly dark neighborhood, very few people have porch lights, and it’s slightly outside of town. There are kids here, but since we live in a tiny little town, most people take their kids to the safe trick or treat on the town square (I cannot believe I live in a town with a town square!). It’s probably for the best, I tend to be that curmudgeon you said you once were. Kids are not my cup of tea, so peace on Halloween is a blessing.

    Come to think of it, I don’t think I’ve lived in any neighborhoods as an adult with trick or treaters… I wonder if it’s a dying tradition?

  2. Yeah, you know, I’m not sure when I started hating children, but I think it started when I saw this pre-teen yelling at her mom. It kind of opened my eyes to kids just not being disciplined these days. I don’t know. Maybe I’m just old.

    Anyway, so long as kids like free candy, I don’t think trick-or-treating is going anywhere.

  3. Halloween is alive and well, check my blog for my Halloween post. Rene, I understand your feeling about undisciplined children. I raised six and can’t stand to be around children running amok, I want to grab their parents and shake them.

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