Guest Blog: Reflections and Gratitude

As a struggling artist, every time I have an opportunity to travel, whether it is for work or to visit family, I always find my time alone to be a time of reflection. What am I doing with my life? Where is my life going? Am I doing the right thing with my life? Am I making the right choices? Are there things I should actively be doing to make some changes? Am I doing everything I absolutely can to help and improve my career so that it moves forward?

Recently, I went to visit my mother in New Hampshire. It’s always nice to see family, but I truly hate New Hampshire. I mean, it is a beautiful place, the foliage is phenomenal, I can completely understand why some people may love it there, but New Hampshire is just not for me. However, all the solitude and silence that comes along with this trip I felt would be a great opportunity for some reflecting time.

Before I even got a chance to start reflecting, I received a call from my talent manager, whom I love. She’s a great woman who has always supported me and my talent. We had one of those “heart-to-heart” conversations where we were talking not just about my career, but where she was having some difficulty in regards to me. She basically stated that she didn’t understand why I hadn’t been going out recently. My headshots are great, my reel is great, my resume speaks for itself, and she raves about me in the comments to the casting directors so she really didn’t understand what was going on and why things were at such a standstill for me right now. I asked her if there was anything I could do. She just stated that I shouldn’t worry and that she would sit and think about my…well, everything, and if there was anything that I may need to change or add. I got off the phone and though she was very encouraging, I couldn’t help but feel semi-defeated and feel like I had, in some way, let her down.

I started to cry a little bit after we said our goodbyes. I was trying to figure out for the life of me what it is that I could do. How I could help. What I should do differently. I went to my website (which does need to be updated) and started making some notes on what exactly I needed to collect and get together for my web designer to update. As I looked at everything on my site, I came across the amazing article that René Garcia, Jr. wrote about me. After revisiting this article, I once again, started crying, but these were happy tears. This article and what René said reminded me of what it is that I bring that’s special. And I realized I had forgotten and haven’t felt this specialness that René portrayed in a very, very long time. I went from feeling horrible about myself and completely lost to feeling inspired and uplifted. Not only has Working Author said such amazing things about me, but they’ve also supported the sketch group I’m in, Cheap Shots Comedy and has always taken an interest in what I’m working on and has always supported that.

When you look at this site, you realize the huge impact that is actually made. Working Author has constantly built up artists, had incredible interviews with artists, great critiques of work, film, writing, comedy and basically anything in entertainment. This site and writing and what it stands for and what it has created is a remarkable reflection of why art is art. It’s a reminder of how entertainment is important and how certain pieces of work and people can change the world and exposes people who have taken a part of that and made that dream possible. It makes you question the world around you…and the fact that I am even somewhat tied in with Working Author is one of the greatest compliments I’ve ever had.

Yes, I am going through a rough patch with my acting career, but I honestly don’t know a single artist that hasn’t gone through this at some point in their life or several times in their life. I’m reminded that it goes with the territory. After revisiting the article written about me, I feel so much better and more confident that I’m doing exactly what I should. Patience is a virtue and I just have to hang in there and keep creating in the ways I know how. And as long as I’m creating, that’s all I’ve ever really wanted to do anyway.

In short…thank you, Working Author and specifically René Garcia, Jr. Thank you for being such a wonderful contribution to the arts, for being a constant inspiration to the many art forms, for reminding me (an artist) why I made the choices I made with my life and most of all, for being such an amazing and supportive friend.